Internal Monologue #3

I feel like he's the reason for my downfall. He's a poison. Like a drug. Because I can't go my day without thinking about him but my brain, the thing that's supposed to be making smart decisions, thinks it was him. It was him who distracted me, freed me from my work, made me different. I'm not regretting any of it, I mean, some of it, but overall, I don't. Because I value him. I do. So why does it feel like a goodbye is on the verge of arrival? I feel like this toxic waste won't survive through the winter. I want it to but I think logic will ultimately separate us and it's truly the worst thought in the world right now. I can't help it. This thought just keeps popping up. And if I was brave enough, I'd say it to his face. But I'm not. And so I wait. I'm screwed...?

Internal Monologue #2

I'm really thirsty right now but don't feel like getting anything to drink...maybe if we had like some exotic tropical juice I would feel like drinking something. Water's just so boring right now...I drink it too often. Though I shouldn't be complaining because there are many people out there who do not even get the luxury of clean water. Haha, this internal monologue just isn't as random as my first one. Probably because I'm alone in my room right now instead in a class and that I can type WAY faster than I can write. Man, technology ruined penmanship. And the ability to spell, I just spell checked penmanship...don't ask, I'm tired.

I wonder how long I've been typing for...I forgot to time myself when I started and the whole point of this is to not stop talking to yourself. Which in a way is kind of psychotic. But I think it's also artistic. Sometimes they can be both. Okay, my fingers are getting tired...maybe I should stop and get back to doing homework. Sigh, I hate homework.

Internal Monologue #1

{Today in English class, we had to write our internal monologues, basically things that we are thinking. I wrote about 3/4 of a page. Yeah, I write big. It's pretty random, but pretty fun at the same time. There's exactly what I wrote, with the exception of my teacher's name.}

We have to write about what we're thinking. I thinkeveryone's going to write the same thing. Oh man, I just connected my two words up there, should I correct it? My pencil case is too far from me, I can see it from the corner of my eye, it makes me nervous. And now my hand hurts from writing this and I didn't even write that much. What's that noise? Oh, Mr. R----, he makes a lot of noise at this desk. No lead, I hate when that happens. Wouldn't it be cool to have someone narrate your life all the time? I guess it'd be weird after a while. My hand really hurts now, what ever happened to my hand muscles? They're probably in my left now. I miss playing Frisbee and guitar, which reminds me, I need to film like a million projects. But where's the time? On the clock, that's where. Haha, that was so lame. Great, now my right eye is hurting. WEIRD! I never realized how random my mind is, it's not good. This is why I'm not allowed to be alone. Mr. R---- has Kool-Aid Jammers, that was funny. Mm, juice, juice boxes, childhood...