You lucked out

All you had to give
was a smile and
I fell for it.

No need for flowers or fancy things.

And now, nothing.
Great, you've got me crazy.

You know me so well.

.tee.

This is just the hat I wear...

Bipolar? Not quite.
Mood swings? Maybe.

All I know is that one day it's like I don't remember him, and the next I can't stop dreaming. I guess it all depends on how silly my hat looks that day.
Or what kind of hat he likes to wear.

I don't like hat hair.

.tee.

p.s. I need to get my focus back, if you've seen it, e-mail me. Thanks.

"and babycakes, don't forget babycakes"

I'm too hooked on Flashpoint. Watched three seasons in two weeks. Yeah, I'm that lonely.

Found a new work hard, play hard attitude.
Day One worked out pretty well.

Happy New Year.

=) .tee.

to play or not to play

I spent all of last week trying to catch his eye and he just brushed me off.  Today, he tried to catch my eye and I kept on walking.

Ha. Table’s finally turned.

My best friend told me to stop playing games with him…and I would, except it's so nice to make him feel the longing that he made me feel last week.  But I guess she's right.

When you play with fire, someone always gets burned.

Always.

Oh well, it was nice playing. Time to get back to reality.

.tee.

if i had a time-machine-tivo, this is what would be on it

(from the past...)

1) Reba -
I miss coming home from school and unwinding to a little bit of HILARIOUS.

2) Eight Simple Rules -
Great, quality, family television.

3) Gilmore Girls -
I think I speak faster after watching that show.

4) Whistler -
Hooray for Canadian television!

5) October Road -
They cancelled the show before I even got a chance to catch up!

6) Friends -
Need I say anymore? At least I can watch reruns everyday after school!

(and of course some current favourites like...)

7) Flashpoint -
Absolutely one of the best shows on TV right now.

8) Amazing Race -
Entertaining AND educational. It doesn’t get any better than this.

9) Ellen -
A feel good show after a hard day of school.

10) TMZ -
If nothing else can make me smile, Harvey can.

.tee.

grinning like an idiot

because he makes me like that. I can't help it.

.tee.

throwing darts blindfolded

I just can't seem to pinpoint why I'm so upset.

maybe because he gives me dirty looks down the hallway, but when we're alone, it's like nothing's changed

maybe because I can't be mad at my best friend for doing what she did because she only had good intentions.

maybe because it sucks to have that beautiful feeling with him and have it come crashing down in a second.

maybe because I keep wishing and wishing for things to happen for me, and they haven't.


.i feel dumb.

.tee.

life changes faster than a kaleidoscope

Remember those things!? I thought they were so cool. Ha, hippie child.

Not too long following my previous entry, my best friend messages me and tells me that she has spoken with my crush about ME.
Obviously my heart rate goes through the roof. (Because this isn't the first time and the first time was ugly).

But then, I liked what she had to say.

So now, all I can say is,
"Don't be afraid, please, jump then fall into me" (Taylor Swift).

I am now in flirt mode.

.Tee.

back up, baby, back up

"...

Were you just kidding?
'cause it seems to me, this thing is breaking down
We almost never speak
I don't feel welcome anymore
Baby what happened, please tell me?
'cause one second it was perfect, now you're halfway out the door

...

Thought I knew you for a minute, now I'm not so sure
So here's everything coming down to nothing
Here's to silence that cuts me to the core
Where is this going? Thought I knew for a minute, but I don't anymore

..."

I don’t like saying this, but if I had a time machine, yes, yes I would go back.

.Tee.

p.s. The piano version of Forever and Always is awesome!

C-A-M-P-F-I-R-E-S-O-N-G-song

I've always felt others could express my life better than I could...

"baby you're a wrecking ball, crashing into me, nothing I can do but fall, piece by piece, you broke down every part of me that ever thought I'd never need you, baby

it's twisted, messed up, and the more I think about it, it's crazy but so what? I may never understand it, I'm caught up and I'm hanging on, I'm gonna love you even if it's wrong"
(Twisted, Carrie Underwood)

"you're toxic I'm slipping under, with a taste of a poison paradise, I'm addicted to you, don't you know that you're toxic? And I love what you do, don't you know that you're TOXIC?"
(Toxic, Britney Spears)

...do you get how I feel now?

.tee.